it’s time to go out of the country.
I had enough of these happenings. Everything is falling apart but I ain’t giving up. I just want to rest my head. This day is worst day I could say. My dad doesn’t want to see me anymore. I feel so useless thinking of the words he said. All I was asking is my time. I’m almost always not in our home because I don’t want them see me sad, I don’t want them see me weak, I don’t want them see me as problematic. Sad thing, I got no one to turn to. Not even to my love of my life as he has more things to think of, and I understand that part. Everyday, I go to church, chapel. Sometimes I go there not the usual time I visit just because I was almost falling apart. I always pray God will give me strength on these things I am facing so that I won’t cry & everyone could see me everything is just fine. I know it’s not right but I just have to. If there’s anyone who can see me sad, it’s only one person, and it’s Arjo (love of my life). I can share, express anything to him, good things or bad things. He knows me when I’m pretending to be okay and when I’m not.
As of the moment, it is God who I am sharing everything. I got no one to turn to. I’m just waiting for that day, less than hundred days from now, when I can finally rest my head…
